Prayer

Prayer has been creeping back into my life a lot recently and its been really powerful.


February 5th: Prayer from the girls at small group for my breathing issues. Lindsay's prayer specifically touched me. She asked that God would take away the weight of these problems - physically and emotionally. I try having it all together and I can't do it all. I've definitely been humbled by my asthma lately. First having an attack in front of Bekah, then Tracie and Tasha. Lowering myself before new friends and God to receive prayer. Last weekend's attack at the mercy of Molly helping me in the ER. Its hard sometimes, but I have to let go. I'll say it again: I can not do it all!


February 11th: I prayed out loud at Mandy's Blessingway. It was like this weight pushing in on me and I just had to say something. I'm glad I stepped out in faith. I hope it was a blessing to my dear friend. Even if it wasn't, it was good for me and God to connect in a way that's been so foreign to me for a while.


February 12th: Time of prayer at Small Group. Waiting in silence for words from the Spirit and man, did He show up for me! Nate Graff sheepishly shared that he got some discomfort in his nose as he prayed and got the sense that someone in the room might be struggling with sinus issues. Hello! Jamie spoke up and asked for prayer for a cold he'd had for a few days. Then I spoke up and said that I was pretty sure that the word was for me (too) since surgery was planned for 5 days later. A subtle gasp was heard around the room. I told them how I'd had a pretty nasty sinus headache starting in the wee hours on Friday all the way through Small Group as I spoke. The pain had been around an 8 out of 10, but at that minute, it was a 4. Nate's face went while and he had a deadpan expression. I instantly felt a connection with him and could tell from his reaction that he was shocked and affirmed in what he shared. I don't think I've ever experienced anything like that before. Its always sort of been odd to me how Vineyard is so into "words", but I've seen how transforming they've been for others, so I sort of pushed through my hangups, resorting to "Oh, that must be for other people." What a gift that that's not true! God's words through other people are for me too! I sat on the coffee table and people gathered around me, laying hands of healing on me and covering me with prayer. Erin prayed words of thankfulness for a god who set the captives free and broke the ties of bondage, that we might have abundant life with Him. She prayed that I'd be see FREE from attacks and that I wouldn't be held back physically, emotionally, or mentally because of them; That I'd know a full life with You, one that's healthy and happy. So good. Erica prayed short, direct prayers that were meaningful, commanding my lungs and sinuses to work properly, to be clear, to cooperate. Ben prayed for our whole family through these issues, for peace and patience. Nick prayed for the mechanics of the surgery, the doctors and nurses involved, the medications I'd receive. Jamie's prayers were maybe the most meaningful. Very direct, yet gentle. Praying God's Kingdom come - healing - peace - freedom. My beloved and others in the group prayed too. It was a very special time. I didn't realize it right away, but after that prayer, the sinus pressure I'd had for 3 solid days was gone... and it hasn't come back since!!! CV is influencing Blinn's prayers too which is cool to see. When he's prayed for me his language has been different and I like seeing him branch out and trust in a new way.


February 17th: Prayers for Mandy throughout labor.


February 18th: Prayer with Mandy, Fez and Molly just before Eden was born. So emotional. Molly prayed that we know You are a god of healing, that we knew You'd heal Mandy from the c-section, Emmy's birth, and the emotional baggage that comes with a birth experience that you're not satisfied with. She prayed for trust and faith and who knows what else because basically upon hearing the word healing, I. lost. it. I was already weepy, but my goodness! I was FULL of love for Mandy and Fez and I the babe I just knew was Eden Elizabeth. I kept seeing the little card Lish wrote that was taped up in the bedroom: "God delights in this." And then something Molly was saying made me ACHE for the son I'll never know in this life. I felt that he was in the room with us, as were Mom, Jenn and Mark. We were on holy ground, a thin space and it was so intensely beautiful. The room seemed to be saturated with, radiated by the Holy Spirit. 


2 nights ago: While rocking Z to sleep I asked her if she wanted to pray. I don't know what possessed me to do that, but what a precious moment. She wanted to pray for Uncle Mike (who she hasn't seen for months!), Amy Palmer (who had just left the house) and Cookie Monster. :) We prayed for all three and it was sweet. 


Last night: Prayers with Z for the same three people, but also Tasha and Papa. Then she wanted Blinn to pray with us and we covered Big Bird, Elmo, all the grandparents, Miles and me. that was The Best of my Day for sure.


This is all really happening. I'm not dreaming, nor am I wathcing watching from the sidelines as God moves in someone else. Its my turn and I am thankful!