Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Giving in and letting go

Its Ash Wednesday and this year, I'm looking forward to celebrating Lent more than I have in years. I'm focusing on The Lord's Prayer and Psalms. Simple, foundational, and I think if I really open myself up, I'll find them profound.

"...he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion..." 
 Philippians 1:6

I am learning the simple, yet complex Truth of this statement. Its sort of hard to pinpoint the exact moment that God and His presence became a more focused part of my life again. Brookside in June 2010 I guess? Columbus has definitely been a good change in my spiritual life though. Geez! More specifically, Central Vineyard. Why in the world did I have the desire to go to Discovering COmmunity - without Blinn and a week after it officially started - back in September? Why did I sit with the Reids, Deckers and Georges in October? Why did I receive prayer from Brooke and Erin that night? Or before DC, why did Erin respond to my "ad" for baby clothes, opening the door for a relationship with her down the road. Ever since the fall, God's been steadily coaxing me, courting me even, and gently welcoming me back. I was never unwelcome of course, nor would I saw that I was ever completely absent from him, but the communion I've found lately with him and the church has been so good.

Last week while talking to Bekah I realized that I needed to let down my guard and stop fighting off the work of the Spirit, but just embrace it. Maybe even seek it. God is moving in my life, there's no denying that anymore. I don't want to hold him at arm's length being skeptical of his plan. I don't want to tell people what's going on with a hint of sarcasm in my voice. I don't want to make this a joke. God's moving, I'm trying to surrender and I'm along for the ride. Its been like a snowball effect for me starting out slow and small, but sort of rapidly getting bigger and gaining speed. Feels kinda crazy, but I like it.



No comments:

Post a Comment